I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
