So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Randomize
