My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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