Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize