guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Found the puke drawer
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
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