Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Randomize