Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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