There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Randomize
