the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
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