are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
