it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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