school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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