Where are you?
In a non slutty way
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
Come see our sink grown plant.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
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