He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Such a big mess for such a small penis
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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