Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.