Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Pappa wants mamma naked
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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