I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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