WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
My butt remains clenched, sir.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
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