walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
