Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
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