Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
