In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Randomize
