WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
