If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
