Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Randomize
