I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
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where are you?
Hypothermia
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
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After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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