You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.