the new term for farting is butt boxing.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
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