what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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