Texts From Last Night

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  (253): View more from Washington

  i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money

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  (253): i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money http://tfl.nu/2wwu
  Replies (3) Good night (1008) Bad night (636)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call

  (720): View more from Colorado

  Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days

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  (505): You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call (720): Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days http://tfl.nu/6f8h
  Replies (4) Good night (1073) Bad night (631)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.

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  (315): Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win. http://tfl.nu/wty0
  Replies (66) Good night (2095) Bad night (836)
• Favorite

  (256): View more from Alabama

  Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?

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  (256): Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it? http://tfl.nu/m23f
  Replies (31) Good night (5867) Bad night (667)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.

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  (631): i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee. http://tfl.nu/3r9a
  Replies (16) Good night (5031) Bad night (747)
• Favorite

  (863): View more from Florida

  I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good

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  (863): I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good http://tfl.nu/hwo6
  Replies (14) Good night (5082) Bad night (1303)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.

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  (785): this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila. http://tfl.nu/7xsl
  Replies (3) Good night (1418) Bad night (1002)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.

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  (630): I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar. http://tfl.nu/ha0p
  Replies (5) Good night (1721) Bad night (1112)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?

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  (918): Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right? http://tfl.nu/jzhy
  Replies (2) Good night (2084) Bad night (735)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  The pigeons can smell the fear

  (1+44): View more from

  Wtf

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  (+44): The pigeons can smell the fear (1+44): Wtf http://tfl.nu/89q6
  Replies (4) Good night (1527) Bad night (638)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic

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  (414): Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic http://tfl.nu/n8i2
  Replies (1) Good night (1172) Bad night (494)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?

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  (203): Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish? http://tfl.nu/j5ph
  Replies (2) Good night (658) Bad night (391)
• Favorite

  (417): View more from Missouri

  Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.

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  (417): Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that. http://tfl.nu/gtr5
  Replies (0) Good night (554) Bad night (317)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown

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  (816): Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown http://tfl.nu/kwyi
  Replies (2) Good night (568) Bad night (323)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.

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  (307): You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper. http://tfl.nu/3yr5
  Replies (2) Good night (372) Bad night (278)

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