Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Randomize
