Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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