Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
COCAINE IS GR8
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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