you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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