no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
