He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
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He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
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How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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