Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future