you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
