You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Randomize
