mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize