She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
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