she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
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