Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
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