that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
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