Texts From Last Night

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  (217): View more from Illinois

  I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?

  (847): View more from Illinois

  haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.

  (217): View more from Illinois

  ... oops

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  (217): I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity? (847): haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that. (217): ... oops http://tfl.nu/gsy7
  Replies (4) Good night (1242) Bad night (541)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.

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  (203): Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle. http://tfl.nu/zfv7
  Replies (7) Good night (2599) Bad night (549)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?

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  (704): is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell? http://tfl.nu/12z5
  Replies (28) Good night (584) Bad night (4632)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.

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  (317): honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill. http://tfl.nu/orse
  Replies (10) Good night (3882) Bad night (704)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls

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  (301): I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls <3 http://tfl.nu/wgu0
  Replies (73) Good night (1671) Bad night (4082)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.

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  (201): Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well. http://tfl.nu/l70h
  Replies (17) Good night (1027) Bad night (5595)
• Favorite

  (647): View more from Ontario

  all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes

  (905): View more from Ontario

  You're fat. Stop making excuses

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  (647): all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes (905): You're fat. Stop making excuses http://tfl.nu/rdmk
  Replies (70) Good night (13433) Bad night (5642)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.

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  (304): Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better. http://tfl.nu/8g47
  Replies (4) Good night (2450) Bad night (569)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?

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  (919): Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you? http://tfl.nu/64mv
  Replies (7) Good night (2603) Bad night (571)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  She wants to have naked weekends

  (541): View more from Oregon

  They call that free range vagina in France

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  (503): She wants to have naked weekends (541): They call that free range vagina in France http://tfl.nu/sou7
  Replies (9) Good night (2772) Bad night (695)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.

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  (732): I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night. http://tfl.nu/l68a
  Replies (4) Good night (1246) Bad night (432)
• Favorite

  (831): View more from California

  I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.

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  (831): I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger. http://tfl.nu/whys
  Replies (7) Good night (1206) Bad night (634)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker

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  (812): Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker http://tfl.nu/znwm
  Replies (6) Good night (2337) Bad night (524)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool

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  (403): Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool http://tfl.nu/mskr
  Replies (4) Good night (315) Bad night (585)
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?

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  (903): I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex? http://tfl.nu/k82d
  Replies (5) Good night (723) Bad night (336)

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