i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
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