Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
we have officially lost it.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
No subtext here. People are naked.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
