Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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