Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I'm gonna have a badass scar
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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