in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Randomize
